The Tyrant Lizard King
I came to write a blog because everyone hates a blog that's never updated and because I'm bored even though I have tons and tons of things I can be doing. I just can't do those things while I'm at work, because they involve cleaning out the garage and moving furniture. Anyway then I got distracted by a link to a blog by this guy who watches the movie Julie and Julia every day and writes about it. And even though watching a movie three times, much less 365 times, is like my worst nightmare after being eaten by a Carnotaurus, the blog is pretty funny so the point is I am just now getting around to getting in here to make a post.
Just now there was something on my desk, like crumbs or something, and I went to blow them off and ended up spitting all over. Gross. So then I had to get the Windex and then I remembered we're not supposed to Windex these desks because it messes up the finish. This is why I should leave the cleaning to the professionals.
Ok, a UPS man just came in the door and it was not the normal UPS man which I'm pretty upset about. I like the usual man, he asks about my vacations and knows my name. This new guy was all, "UPS here." Um, yeah pal, I can tell you're with UPS on account of the giant brown truck you drove up in, and your brown shorty-shorts, and the package you're delivering that says UPS Express Envelope on the front. Plus he talked in deep voice and didn't take his sunglasses off. And they always try to hand the pen to my right hand. Look here friend, stop discriminating against me because I'm left-handed. So for all that I signed extra slowly and neatly to throw him off his schedule. Ha! Take that.
I'm not really scared of being eaten by Carnotaurus. That would be ridiculous. On my dinosaur flashcards, Carnotaurus looks really scary, like this:
When I saw him I was like whoa, that is way scarier than T-Rex, I am surprised he is not more popular.
Then I looked up Carnotaurus on Wikipedia and he looks like this:
And that's basically like a mean chicken with gimpy arms. So I have mixed feelings about Carnotaurus. So...that's all. I'm going to punch my coworker now because it's punch a coworker day. I'm just kidding, it isn't really. That was yesterday.
Just now there was something on my desk, like crumbs or something, and I went to blow them off and ended up spitting all over. Gross. So then I had to get the Windex and then I remembered we're not supposed to Windex these desks because it messes up the finish. This is why I should leave the cleaning to the professionals.
Ok, a UPS man just came in the door and it was not the normal UPS man which I'm pretty upset about. I like the usual man, he asks about my vacations and knows my name. This new guy was all, "UPS here." Um, yeah pal, I can tell you're with UPS on account of the giant brown truck you drove up in, and your brown shorty-shorts, and the package you're delivering that says UPS Express Envelope on the front. Plus he talked in deep voice and didn't take his sunglasses off. And they always try to hand the pen to my right hand. Look here friend, stop discriminating against me because I'm left-handed. So for all that I signed extra slowly and neatly to throw him off his schedule. Ha! Take that.
I'm not really scared of being eaten by Carnotaurus. That would be ridiculous. On my dinosaur flashcards, Carnotaurus looks really scary, like this:
Then I looked up Carnotaurus on Wikipedia and he looks like this:
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