Sometimes I'm an Angerball.
So it seems I have this cold. I'm not really one for getting sick- not that I don't enjoy it, I mean, who doesn't wish for a legitimate reason to skip work, lie in bed and receive sympathy every so often? I just don't ever get sick. The last time I had a full-blown, stay in bed cold was sophomore year of college. So let's just say it's been a while.
Anyway, I guess I have a cold, because I keep sneezing and sniffling. The sneezing is totally karma coming after me because this weekend in Phoenix Callie was like, I have a cold, and she was sneezing like crazy all day, and I was like, I've never heard of anyone having a cold where they just sneeze all the time. I thought that was for cartoons, like how roadrunners are as big as coyotes and their legs spin in circles. But Callie was all, no, that is how I am when I get a cold. And I thought, oh, that's not that bad. But guess what, you guys? It is that bad! Because for every sneeze that comes out, there are 12 that don't come out, and you have to go through your day perpetually almost-sneezing, with tingly eyes and a stuffy runny nose, and I can't breathe unless upright, and it is all very dramatic and sad. No, not really. But it's a pain.
And then last night, while I was busy trying to sleep and breathe at the same time, I woke up to the smoke detector beeping. Not beeping as though it had detected smoke, but beeping to let me know that the battery was dying. This is kind of a trick that these smoke detectors do, because in fact they are wired into the house and work regardless of whether they have batteries in them or not. Ask me how I know this. So it was 2:47AM, which meant it was really more like 2:32AM because that clock is 15 minutes fast, and a smoke detector was beeping. It beeped once every few minutes. I knew I had a battery for it, because ever since the time I had to go to Circle K at 4AM to get a battery to stop the beeping, I try to keep those on hand. The thing about the smoke detectors in my house is that they are plentiful. Probably there are 5 in the house. So in order to find out which one is beeping, you have to go to the room where you think you heard the beep, then wait around for it to beep again. Sometimes you're right, sometimes you're not and you have to move on to the next one. Did I mention it was 2:47AM? I decided not to track down the dying battery. I just stayed in bed, listening to that beep, trying to breathe.
The beeping was gone when I got up this morning. I'm not sure if it gave up or if it repowered itself (possibly by sapping my energy, somehow? I'm not great with science) or if maybe it was just playing a mean little trick on me, but today I am tired and grouchy and still can't breathe that well and still have a cold. Boo. So, today I am an angerball.
And to add to this, completely unrelated- my boss just walked in and was like, oh, those are big earrings. That's all he said. They are, in fact, big earrings, but now I am feeling all weird about them. Grr.
Anyway, I guess I have a cold, because I keep sneezing and sniffling. The sneezing is totally karma coming after me because this weekend in Phoenix Callie was like, I have a cold, and she was sneezing like crazy all day, and I was like, I've never heard of anyone having a cold where they just sneeze all the time. I thought that was for cartoons, like how roadrunners are as big as coyotes and their legs spin in circles. But Callie was all, no, that is how I am when I get a cold. And I thought, oh, that's not that bad. But guess what, you guys? It is that bad! Because for every sneeze that comes out, there are 12 that don't come out, and you have to go through your day perpetually almost-sneezing, with tingly eyes and a stuffy runny nose, and I can't breathe unless upright, and it is all very dramatic and sad. No, not really. But it's a pain.
And then last night, while I was busy trying to sleep and breathe at the same time, I woke up to the smoke detector beeping. Not beeping as though it had detected smoke, but beeping to let me know that the battery was dying. This is kind of a trick that these smoke detectors do, because in fact they are wired into the house and work regardless of whether they have batteries in them or not. Ask me how I know this. So it was 2:47AM, which meant it was really more like 2:32AM because that clock is 15 minutes fast, and a smoke detector was beeping. It beeped once every few minutes. I knew I had a battery for it, because ever since the time I had to go to Circle K at 4AM to get a battery to stop the beeping, I try to keep those on hand. The thing about the smoke detectors in my house is that they are plentiful. Probably there are 5 in the house. So in order to find out which one is beeping, you have to go to the room where you think you heard the beep, then wait around for it to beep again. Sometimes you're right, sometimes you're not and you have to move on to the next one. Did I mention it was 2:47AM? I decided not to track down the dying battery. I just stayed in bed, listening to that beep, trying to breathe.
The beeping was gone when I got up this morning. I'm not sure if it gave up or if it repowered itself (possibly by sapping my energy, somehow? I'm not great with science) or if maybe it was just playing a mean little trick on me, but today I am tired and grouchy and still can't breathe that well and still have a cold. Boo. So, today I am an angerball.
And to add to this, completely unrelated- my boss just walked in and was like, oh, those are big earrings. That's all he said. They are, in fact, big earrings, but now I am feeling all weird about them. Grr.
Comments
Once I was at my friend's house and her fire alarm was beeping and she said it had been like that for weeks. And they didn't even fix it. I was there about 10 minutes and I wanted to smash it.